Saturday, December 25, 2010

My Christmas...

My Christmas was ok. It was better than expected. I did get my feelings hurt a few times but I am like that. I am a nice person and don't understand why people say hurtful things to someone such as myself that does so much for them. Oh well, nothing new.
Christmas Eve went over quite nice considering it was the first year without my grandmother. My grandfather did refuse to come to my sister's house. My mom's sister and her husband did come and there was no big explosion with her. Honestly, I thought she was stoned or highly drugged out on something.
Christmas Morning was pretty good too. It was just my family. My brother and his wife had to leave for their flight to IL after about an hour. Our breakfast was good .
In the afternoon, I accompanied my mom to my grandfather's house. We stopped by one of my grandparent's good friend's house. The man is a widower. He was so happy to see us and to get a hug. We then went by the grave site. A friend of my mom's had placed some pretty poinsettias on my grandmother's site. As we were leaving a car pulled up with two women in it. One of the ladies got out and approached us with a flyer. She said just a little Biblical Brochure on what happens to dead people. I was offended and found it extremely tacky. I looked on the inside and knew why. It was the JW's. Needless to say I immediately ripped it up. There are places to witness but I don't think a grave site on Christmas is one of them. My opinion, though. Me ripping it up meant one less person will get that material.
From there we ventured to my grandfather's house. My mom's sister was already there and waiting for my mom to arrive to cook him Oyster Stew. My mom's sister does not cook. Her new hubby though watched my mom so that he could cook some more tomorrow on their Sunday visit. Sundays are my mom's day off from going up there. Her one day off from going up there. As I mentioned, I was afraid of what my reception would be when he saw me. He saw me, looked weird and I was scared. Then he asked for a hug. He hugged me tightly and started crying. He said that he loves me and knew that I loved him too. I was glad I went even if it was only for a short while. He is still very bitter with my sister and brother though.
I still wonder how he can be deemed competent and in his right mind. Oh yeah, I forget my mom's sister lied to the doctors. He asked me when we were going to open our business. I was dumbfounded and told him it had been open. He asked if I was running it. I told him no that my brother was. He shook his head. I then wrote him a note that the store had been open since April. He was shocked. If you remember for weeks he had been up there all day with my mom caring for him while she worked. I told him that my brother was heading to Illinois by plane and he told me the weather was bad for travel. A half hour later my mom told him the same thing and he acted like he did not know any of it. He then started telling my mom's sister's husband a story of when I was young that everyone has heard and knows by heart but her husband. Then he started to tell her about it too and she knows the story by heart too. I wanted to look at her and say...This is the man you have deemed competent and able to live on his own.
Over all it was a good Christmas despite the turmoil. Tonight my sister honored my grandmother by having the exact dinner she always fixed minus her green beans from the garden.
Jesus is the Only reason for the season. Merry Christmas and the big surprise tonight that has not happened since I was a child..... A WHITE CHRISTMAS!

1 comment:

That corgi :) said...

You had a white Christmas! How cool Becky!! It seemed like it was a nice day, all in all. I agree with you, witnessing at a cemetary on a holiday is not a good idea, totally tacky! I'm glad you had a chance to see your grandfather, you always want to do the honorable thing here even though he has chosen not to, if you know what I mean.

Him re-telling stories like that does sound a bit like a "forgetful memory". I know in looking back I could see when my MIL's memory started going because we were visiting them from out of town and she told me the same story every day we were there. In looking back, I realized that was the start of it; at the time I just thought she was so excited about the event she wanted to keep relating it.

Doctors do mini-mental status exams in their offices; its a series of 30 questions and then can pretty much determine by the tests people's mental capacities and if they are demeted, forgetful, etc. Might be good to see if one was ever done on your grandfather.

I am sure it was hard not to have your grandmother there this year, but what a touching gesture to have "her" dinner!