Sunday, October 31, 2010

What I did this weekend...

What I did this weekend...
  • I did not get a job on Thursday and was disappointed. That is what is hard about being a substitute, sometimes you just don't get to them quick enough online and someone beats you to it. This could happen just by not refreshing the page every minute.
  • Took Friday off, I had already planned this to go to a Christmas in the Plantation craft show in Surry, VA.
  • Tried a boiled peanut. BLAHHH! Tasted somewhat like a not so salty black eyed pea but the pea tastes a 100% better. Glad the lady offered me one before I bought the bag. Didn't know a boiled peanut in the shell made the nut soft and mushy. The man behind me told me it was an acquired taste, acquired alright. He was buying 4 bags of them. He was cute too. A lumberjack man. May have to go back to find him and introduce him to plain old roasted in-shell peanuts.
  • Went to Virginia Beach with my mom and stayed in a time-share facility someone gave to us for the weekend. I was scared because VA Beach had a bad bed bug outbreak this summer. That was the first thing I checked. It was a nice, newly renovated facility. Not spectacular but nice.
  • Found a restaurant in my coupon book and enjoyed a fabulous seafood dinner in Virginia Beach. If you are ever there, it is Abbey Road.
  • Tried Oyster Rockefeller bisque and it was good, needed salt.
  • Spent time in the hot tub.
  • Drove down Atlantic Ave and found a breakfast place called Pocahontas Pancakes. Found out it was on Food Network a few years ago and in Southern Living in March. Tried the sampler which was enough food for an army. Two eggs, two sausage, two bacon, two pancakes and half of Belgian waffle. The waffles and the pancakes were fabulous.
  • Rented a double wide bike with my mom. Ummh, never again. Three wheels, two seats, two sets of pedals, one handlebar. We were practically laying down and we were not in sync. She finally near the end got up and walked. Needless to say I am sore, sore, sore today.
  • Walked the boboardwalk and watched the surfers.
  • Drove into town and went shopping. Found another coupon for another restaurant. Ordered a drunken ribeye and it was tender and delish.
  • Tried Irish Nachos at this place. They were good but the cheese sauce tasted a little too much like beer. My mom loved it though.
  • Went back to the hot tub.
  • Slept very little, great beds though but I have a bad back and anything but my bed or an air mattress is bad on my back. I miss my water bed.
  • Went back to Pocahontas Restaurant for breakfast. This time we split the pecan pancakes which were featured on the THE BEST OF... on the Food Network.
  • Walked the boardwalk. Enjoyed the view of a handsome fellow putting up the volleyball nets for tournaments for the day. I think I enjoyed the view too much, I think I was staring. Oh yeah, I watched beach flag football , not near as interesting as my volleyball man.
  • Headed home.
  • Stopped on the Norfolk/ VA Beach border to visit my two cousins in their first apartment. My cousin just finished his Masters and received a job in computer programming starting at 60K. I miss him. He is only 20-25 minutes away but it is through a tunnel which around here is a whole different world. Such a great kid... he deliberately rented a two bedroom so his brother could live with him for free and not have dorm and food fees while finishing his education. A savings of $5500 a semester.
  • Tried Viet Namese food for the second time. I stayed away from the Pho Soup, my first experience was not so good. I tried the fried rice but after tasting the soup at this place , I regretted not ordering it. It was delicious.
  • Headed home again.
  • Went to trunk or treat at my church... I was a black eyed pea.... Yep I wore the letter P and had two black eyes. HAHAHAHAH!

Great Weekend!

Thursday, October 28, 2010


Recently we have started burning one of our candles that we sell at our store in the store. We are in an old building that when it rains it can smell musty, so this helps. It also helps promote the candles.

Well yesterday after school I stopped by the store and lit the candle while I was there . I told my mom that I had lit it and that she needed to remember to blow it out when she came home.

I never thought about it anymore until I awoke at 3 AM wondering if she had blown the candle out. I tried to dismiss it but I couldn't. I kept thinking if the store burns down it is all my fault. So I went and woke my mom up and she did not remember blowing the candle out either.

Off we went at 3 am out to our business to check this candle. Sure enough it was burning away and you could see the little flame in the canister twinkling away from the main boulevard.

We unlocked the door while still in our jammies and walked over with our flashlight and blew it out. Needless to say we will use one of the candle burners that melt candles with electricity plugged into the surge protector that gets turned off every night. Lesson learned.

I must say though when we walked in the store at the wee hour of 3:20 AM , the store smelled awesome like fresh picked apples.

Whoooh! Thank You Lord for protecting the store.

Sunday, October 24, 2010


Nothing has changed on the home front. We are 99% positive my mom was removed from the will. His neighbor came over to talk to him for three hours about how wrong he was and even backed it up with scripture but my grandfather was being bull-headed. He is using the Old Testament as his rightfulness about the oldest child inheriting everything.

My cousin who lives away stopped by to get a bed she had stored at his house. Let me correct myself, her husband went to get the bed. My grandfather could not understand why they were taking one of his beds. It was not one of his beds, it is theirs that they have stored there. He explained it to him three times and he still did not understand. He still thinks my cousin took one of his beds. Her husband had the same conversation with him about us living in New Testament times and the law about the oldest inheriting things is Jewish law. That led into the fact that my grandfather thinks that the scholars who wrote the KJV were all drunks. Needless to say the conversation went no where.

Now he wants our pastor to come talk to him so our pastor will tell him how right he is. My pastor does not want to because it will lead to arguments because he is wrong.

Now onto other things about him. My mom went to check on him Friday and left when he started in on how much he loves her BUT..... So she left before it started. She locked the house up and left him in his chair in the living room. We found out through my cousin that he ventured out in the yard. I dont know how he got down his garage steps because he is so weak. He was in his scooter around dusk when some people drove by that thought he looked in trouble so stopped to help. He yelled at them that he was fine. It brought the attention to the neighbor that checks on him. My grandfather yelled at him too that he was fine and could care for himself but refused to go inside. So the neighbor called my mom's sister, not my mom. The neighbor likes my mom and knows what is going on so he figured if my mom's sister is getting it all then she can handle all the problems. She arrived and was yelled at also that he can care for himself and has a paper from his doctor to prove it. My mom's sister refused to call my mom about this because she knows it is proof he is losing it. She keeps saying that he is fine and in his right mind because he says he is and anything Daddy says is truth. I can just tell you that this couple driving by saw something that caused them to be concerned enough to drive by several times before stopping to help him.

Please continue to pray for my family, especially my mom. This is utter rejection to her as a child of his.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

I tried to stay out of it...

I really did try to stay out of it. My mother went to return the car that he gave to her that he claims he did when he was not in his right mind. I drove down the road 35 minutes from where the school was that I was working at today to pick her up. I walked in the door and the door slammed. I heard him yelling at my mom and accusing my Dad of some untruths. One of them was that my Dad has brainwashed her to hate her sister. No brainwashing was needed. Her sister did all this with no help. See up until this last year my Dad liked her and thought she was great too until he saw her deceitful ways.

It really broke my heart to hear my mom telling her father that she was sorry she was ever born and sorry she was born to a man who only had enough love for one child and that is her sister. He never has treated my mom right. He never denied any of it. Just kept telling her that my family had brainwashed her.

He also said he would pray for my Dad's salvation. I stood in the hallway totally flabbergasted. He kept going even after my mom pleaded with him to stop. There was more said when my mom screamed for him to stop because his granddaughter had heard it all. He then before knowing who it was accused me of being a sneak and a thief by sneaking in his house. I did not sneak, I walked in and the door slammed. I walked into his living room and looked at his face, he was shocked it was me because I had not been in all this mess. HE did not apologize for calling me a thief and a sneak. He started to tell me how he loved me so much but my parents were awful people. I told my mom to leave and went off on him. I told him my parents had done nothing to him but care for him for 3 months and that him being ugly to them was not right. He looked at me and told me that their good care was a matter of opinion and that he had been treated badly and had not said anything. Oh, this is so untrue. He also told me he knew I would see their side just like my brother because blood is thicker than water. I guess I don't come from his bloodline. Then he went on to remind me that he loaned my brother some money years ago when he needed it and he was ashamed of my brother for going off on my mom's sister. The money was paid back nine years ago. I wrote on his board that I loved him as my grandfather and I was ashamed of his attitude towards my parents. He continued to tell me that he loved me and that when I stand over his casket when he is dead that I can remember that. I waved goodbye to him as I uttered to myself... You loved me before or after you called me a sneak and a thief for just walking in the door.

The sad part of all this today is that she had a good morning with him. It wasn't until she was leaving that he wanted to say some things. Say somethings alright. He was plain mean. He was all nice to her when she was making sure he didnt go to bed tonight in a soaked bed and made him breakfast and a good lunch. Once again, he was plain mean.

I look back hours later. It was useless to talk to him. The man I talked to was not my grandfather this was a mean old stranger today. I don't know how he was deemed competent on Monday. Oh, I do know , my mom's sister took him to the doctor and lied to the doctor about things. Told the doctor the neighbors will check on him 2-3 times a day. How do we know all this? My mom called the doctor and talked to him. My mom also talked to the neighbors today and no such agreement was made. In fact, one neighbor says the next time he comes in the house and he is sitting in pee and wet, he will call social services. As for being competent, I don't know how a doctor can deem that out of a 96.5 year old after a 15 minute appointment and declare him able to care for himself with assistance from the neighbors. My mom's sister is that good.

In the mean time, my parents have backed away. My mom will go up there two times a week to see to it that he has food. This is what they have had to do for their own well-being. When he gets ugly , she will leave.

Oh and by the way, my grandfather said that he would pray for my forgiveness too. I asked him for what and he said for fussing at him even though he did not hear a word of it. Also said he forgives me even though I have not asked for his forgiveness. Since when is telling someone they are treating others bad a sin

I am tired of it all.

So, I still sit here wondering, spiritually wise... How is evil still winning?

Friday, October 15, 2010

Never Stops...

My dad went up to my grandfather's this morning to make sure he had breakfast. He is stubborn and was told not to but he did anyways. He was greeted with an inquiry as to why he was here. Then my grandfather went on to tell him that he has no beef against my father it is all against my mother and she was the reason for all the turmoil yesterday. He still says she yelled at him. He is 99.9 % totally deaf. I can sit right in his ear and talk to him and he wont hear me. So even if she did yell how did he hear it. She said she did not yell. He said he is going to have a neighbor take him to a lawyer to remove my mom from the will.

In last post, I do think you read that last night he had turned on my father. This just proves he has lost it mentally. My mom has reached the conclusion that he needs to be evaluated for competency but her sister will not agree with it. Her sister and him are still going to the doctor on Monday to deem him able to care for himself. Her sister is coniving and threatening and this doctor will do it. She has a way to manipulate all men. She wants to be able to tell my grandfather that it was my mother who deemed him incompetent so she can look like the angel.

Social Services was called and they were ready to intervene after talking to my sister. My sister agreed to give it through the weekend.

We just received a call from my grandfather's neighbor. He heard all the yelling yesterday and wanted to check in on things. He has been asked to get the name and number of my grandfather's realtor so that my grandfather can deed the house to my mom's sister. It is unbelievable.

I just still do not understand the conflict of good and evil. I thought good was supposed to win out but in the situation , it is evil.

Thursday, October 14, 2010


Everyone is home. Nothing really resolved.

My grandfather has turned on my father. My grandfather has "head of household" syndrome. He does not appreciate anything my father has done for him the last year. He just sees that when my father is up there that he likes to watch tv. My grandfather thinks he should ask permission to watch tv. He just sees that when my father wants to read at night , he turns a light on. He thinks my father should ask permission to turn a light on. My grandfather thinks when my Dad is hot that he has to ask permission to turn the fan on. See since my father does all these things he is defying the "head of household" by not asking permission.

The temporary solution. My father will no longer stay with him at night. He will fend for himself. If he falls, he will lay there until which time someone comes to check on him.

The things with my mom's sister are unresolved. She is still lying and manipulating. She is taking him to a doctor on Monday to deem him capable of taking care of himself. He is 96 and has limited use of his legs. He can not cook and can not use a microwave. In my last post, you will remember that he just fell two nights ago. Prior to that a month or so ago , he fell three times in two weeks. My mom and dad can not keep pouring their time and emotions into a man that acts like they are scum. They have tried and given everything. They are tired. When he was released from the hospital in May, he was released under the conditions that someone will be with him 24 hours a day. He has chosen to be alone. Social Services is being called tomorrow from my sister. Not to report my parents but to report on him. This is the step that needs to be taken for him to go into a home. We never wanted him in a home and it was never a thought but for the sanity of the family , it is necessary.

My grandfather was coming up to our family business everyday ( my Dad would drive him in on his way home from the night and pick him back up on his way back there at night) until my mom and brother did not side with him on the "head of household" syndrome. They think if someone is volunteering their time to care for you that you appreciate them and not be ugly. When my brother did not side with him, he brought up the time 10 years ago that my grandparents loaned him money when he was in trouble. All of that money was paid back years ago. As for him being at the store, it made life easy for my mom since she was his caregiver. She could work and he had his own spot and his own chair and was happy until yesterday. We found out though that my mom's sister did not consider that part of taking care of him. Since my mom was working she could not be taking care of him. Nope, she didn't feed him, change his Depends when he had an accident, help him to the bathroom and just see to it that all his needs and wants were met, including his daily milkshakes. Nope, that is not taking care of him.

My sister and I keep saying that my grandfather is becoming senile. My mom keeps saying we are wrong because the man he is right now is the man she grew up with. It just makes me adore my grandmother even more for putting up with it all her life. I see now that she really had a hard life. He never let her watch tv. In the daytime she could never have a light on. She had to cook what he was in the mood to eat. I could go on.

Well I have vented for the night. Thanks friends for your comments and prayers. Please don't stop praying.


There has been a pow-wow going on at my grandfather's house for over 3 hours. The last update I had was that it was a screaming match and that my mom's sister was telling more lies.

First let me tell you... My grandfather has been on my mom's back for three months to take him to a lawyer and remove her sister from the will. My mom has refused.

Today, her sister and husband actually stayed last night. It is a miracle. She never stays. My grandfather is mad at my mom for yelling at him when he said something derogatory against my father. Update... My mom said, she did not yell at him that she walked away from the conversation. My father who has stayed at his house every night for almost a year to care for him and for my grandmother at the time. My mom felt he had no right to down my father.

My mom receives a phone call that my grandfather is wanting my aunt's husband to take him to a lawyer to remove my mom from the will. He was really going to take him. My mother informed her of the requests for the past three months but was told she was lying. Then my grandfather says that if he said that then he was not in his right mind. So my mom told her to call her son-in-law, he also was asked to take him to a lawyer to remove my mom's sister and refused. He verified it was true.

So last I heard at 4:30 was there was a screaming match and that my very even tempered brother was up there for my mom' s witness and moral support and he was yelling too. I was told my aunt just keeps telling lie after lie after lie. How she keeps them all straight , I don't know but she does.

So please continue to pray. They all are still up there and I know nothing.

As for the question of leaving my mom's sister with my grandfather on that .25 a day. She will leave him and then say my parents should have shown up to take care of him. That happened the other day when my father arrived 5 minutes after she left. In that 5 minutes my grandfather fell and she said it was my father's fault for not being there 5 minutes sooner.

Wednesday, October 13, 2010


Tired of the drama....Tired of it all.

I have not posted about my family drama in awhile. I still wont tonight. Just know it is still happening. Everyday. I mean EVERY DAY.

My parents have been tending to my grandfather for 24 hours a day 6.75 days a week. The .25 a day my aunt visits him. That is it. That is also between her going out of town for two to three weeks at a time.

He is losing control of his life. He has been a literal butt the last few days towards my parents and has acted like my aunt is the best thing on earth. No I will not regret saying he has been a butt because he has.

My mom's sister, formerly known as my aunt has been verbally and mentally abusive to my mother for the past year. She says things on the phone with no witnesses and then when approached by someone she denies saying it. She is the queen of lies and manipulation.I have heard her say these things on the cell phone myself but says I lie. Then accuses my mom of lying. My mom can not tell a lie. Now this woman has turned her new husband in the situation and he hates my mom and thinks my mom is the bad one. He is brainwashed by her. She has the conversations with my mom when he is outside or visiting his kids. She is good. Why should we expect anything less from him though ? He lied on his Eharmony application about his age. He
said he was 72 and he was 78.

I am so tired of the one doing the work and being the good one being dogged. When will it finally be the good one wins over evil? My grandfather made her this way because she was "his" child and my mom was my grandmother's. In the end of both lives , my mom has been the one caring for them both.

When will this all be over? I hate the stress.

Please pray. Please pray. Please pray . I write this with tears in my eyes. I am so tired of it all.

As a family, well my immediate family. We are supposed to go to my mom's sister's for Thanksgiving and pretend we are one happy family but we are not. I really think I am going to be the first to make the phone call that I will not be there at her house on Thanksgiving. That is suppposed to be a relaxing family day. I have hated going to her house since her and I had words a few years ago in NY at the Rockefeller Center. A nice holiday should not be misery.

This has to stop some time. She has the reap the repercussions of her ways.

Well I said I wouldn't post about the drama but I did. This is only a smidgen. If I posted everything it would be a book and it would make your head spin.

Do I care that some rare chance that she may read this? NOPE I don't because I have posted the truth. You can not keep dogging our mother and father and manipulating my grandfather and expect respect or the perfect "Rockwell " holiday picture. Nope , you can't.

I am tired. I am done.

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Why did I do that????????

Why did I go to McDonald's and order food?

I was hungry. It was late. I knew it would take 15-20 minutes to cook something at home. I sat waiting for my food for 12 minutes. That should have been a clue but at that time they already had my money.

The Big Mac was nothing that it used to be. The fries were sub-par.

Oh why ! Oh why did I make that decision. My tummy is now feeling green too.

I rarely eat fast-food besides Subway and Chinese. So for me to go McDonald's was really rare and now I remember why.

Next time make mental note. The 20 minutes to cook something at home is so worth it over McDonald's food.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

AHHH... Fall!

Itchy eyes....Itchy ears..... Itchy throat..... Runny Nose.....Bronchitis Cough approaching fast....... AHHHHH..... FALL!


All of this after just recovering from the stomach flu too.

Give me winter and summer anytime.