Friday, November 26, 2010

In times of stress...

In times of stress....

Some people turn to alcohol, nope not me
Some people turn to drugs, nope not me
Some people turn to food, used to be me
I turn to soda now.....

My first drink of the day was at the hospital and it was an XL Pepsi from the cafeteria and a small serving of mac and cheese.

A few hours later , I had lunch and the rest of the soda.

I stopped at my sister's and had more soda.

This evening I ate some of my delicious lo-mein like dish that I make with Ramen and leftovers. I did drink water.

Now I want another Pepsi. I know I have it in the car. I keep it in the car because it is least tempting but now I really really want some and am trying not to go to the car.

I am getting desperate enough to even drink the Mountain Dew White Out that I bought for my nephew but I really don't prefer.

When I am not under stress, I really only drink one can a day, if that. When I am under stress, I want soda and more soda and more soda.

No update on my Dad, just that he is in the hospital for observing for the night. I will tell you that my grandfather has made me extremely mad though. I have mentioned that my parents were using his car to drive back and forth to take care of him because it is less on gas but they gave it back to him with his latest craziness with my mom's sister. His neighbor went to check on him when he heard what had gone on this morning when my father was on his way to take my grandfather breakfast. The neighbor told him what happened to my Dad. My grandfather's first statement had nothing to do with my Dad and whether he was alright. His first statement was... I am glad he did not have my car. How inconsiderate and selfish of him. I just sit here shaking my head, even the neighbor was appalled.

Secondly , my sister went by there to check on my grandfather when she went to clear my Dad's car out and look for his teeth. At this time he did inquire about my Dad. She went to hug him and be the better person after the ugly pow-wow a few weeks ago. He snubbed her and turned his head. Then started in on the things from the pow-wow a few weeks ago. She ignored him and left. He thinks she is the reason for his license almost being revoked, she did nothing. He thinks she is trying to put him in a home, she is not. Yes, she called social services but backed out with the attitude if wants to die like this then let him die like this. It is his stubborn decision.

Now that my Dad wont be driving for awhile, it leaves all the pressure of checking on my grandfather 5 days a week to my mother. My Dad was really good about helping her. She can not do that and see to it that my Dad gets to where he has to go, work, and pick my nephew up from school on our days to babysit. So, the question is... Will her sister do what needs to be done.... Probably Not.


That corgi :) said...

I know you'll be careful with the amount of soda you drink, Becky. You've been doing good with eating healthier, so just try to stay on plan even in this time of stress.

I feel for all sides, your parents, you and your siblings, your grandfather. I've said it before and I'll say it again, its such a no-win situation for all with what is going on with how your grandfather is choosing to live his days. So sad.

Will continue to pray for you all


The Brown Recluse said...

I'm sorry about all this.

My suggestion: Someone needs to go and tell grandpa that because of the accident, your parents won't be coming for a few weeks, and that auntie will be coming. Let auntie know that's what he's been told, and that she is fully expected to take care of things.

I can't really grasp that after everything that's been said and done that your parents still take on most of the responsibility.

Marcia said...

Praying for you. Stay strong and you will make it through.