Tuesday, June 21, 2011

I enjoyed my conversation...

This is what my mom's sister told my cousin about her conversations with me on Sunday."I really enjoyed my converstations with Becky today". I was flabbergasted because I would not call it a conversation. I just answer her questions if they are directed at me. Today she was the happy part of Jekyl and Hyde.

Her: Have you found a Full-Time teaching job?
Me: Nope
Her: Are you substituting right now?
Me: Not any more.
Her: It is a real shame because you are so educated then you went back to teach and get your license. It just is not fair.
Me :( Just stare at her. She didnt ask a question. I only answer her questions if she asks one.)
Her: Your Dad says you are going to Robert's for dinner? ( Robert is my brother)
Me: Yes.
Her: Have I eaten there before?
Me: I have no idea.
Her: Isn't it down that road?
Me: Yeah ( Well my brother does live down a road).
Her: What do they serve?
Me: ( Look at her like she has totally lost it )
Her: Robert's, right?
Me: Yeah Robert's house.
Her: It is called Robert's House.
Me: That is what I call it. (at this point I realize her Alzheimer's has kicked in and she forgets I have a brother name Robert, so I am being mean and playing along. )
Her: I forget where exactly is "Robert's House" and what do they serve?
Me: Hamburgers.
Her: (flabbergasted) Hamburgers.
Me. Yep , off the grill. ( At this point I am chuckling and knowing I am giving her a hard time)
Her: Robert's House and they serve hamburgers off the grill. OH! You mean Robert W. , your brother's house.
Me: ( Just smiling and looking at her like she is dumb)
Her: What is your sister-in-law cooking?
Me: Nothing
HEr: But you are going to their house for dinner, right.
Me: Yeah Rob is cooking hamburgers.
Her: What is his wife cooking?
Me: Nothing.
Me: Nothing, Robert is cooking.
At this point my MOm walks in the room.

Her to my Mom: What is Rob's wife cooking?
Me: ( Looking at her like she is crazy again because I just answered this question.)
My MOm: Nothing
Her to my Mom: What?
Mom: NOthing.
Her: What is nothing?

I kid you not this is what she said. What is nothing? Alzheimer's again. At some point out of the blue she announced that she had a gem replaced on her 25th anniversary ring that her second husband gave her. She was only married to him for 8 years before he died. So how could he give her a 25th anniversary ring. That ring was from my uncle who died in 1991 whom she was married to for over 30 years. Then she told my Mom that the new ramp that was built in the front for my grandfather's wheelchair was built by her second husband ( she mentioned him by name) this weekend. He died about 5 years ago and she is currently married to husband number three who built the ramp this weekend. This is the woman who is in charge of everything with my grandfather. Really!

End of conversations. This is the longest conversation I have had with this woman for two years. So she was so excited that I spoke to her. You see, I dont "talk" to her. I just merely answer her questions , which is all I basically did. This is also the first time since my grandmother died that I have been in the same room with her at my choice. It was my choice to be there since it was Father's Day and I was there to see my Grandfather for a few minutes. It was only coincidental that she was there . I was not going to make my grandfather get hurt or suffer because I did not go into that room because of her. I have more integrity than that. Usually if she is in a room, I am not.

Now the mean side of her Jekyl and Hyde was leaving nasty voice messages with my Mother again yesterday questioning her as a Christian again because she wont talk to her and subject herself to the verbal abuse during another situation.

Just a little insight of what we go through with her and this was somewhat of a good day.

1 comment:

The Brown Recluse said...

I can't help but wonder if her Alzheimers is causing her to hold on to any kind of control she can (your grandfather) because she knows she's losing it herself...and that is out of her control.
At any rate...I guess you're going to get mad at me when I say this, but I think forgiveness would go a long way in mending some fences, and you may even find that you're able to get a better response to your grandfather's care when more love and less animosity is put into the situation. Keeping in mind that she is obviously sick may make it easier to deal with her antics.