Saturday, August 14, 2010

50 years

Still experiencing some life Blahhss! So I have been kind of quiet lately.

50 years.... My sister and I are planning an anniversary dinner for my parents. I have been dwelling alot on the fact they have been married for 50 years. That is a long time for dedication. I mean 50 years, Wowsers! That is longer than I have been around. Well it should be , actually. 50 years, wow. Think about that is 25 years twice, that is a lot of years.

In those 50 years, there has been good and bad. There has been some money and no money. There has been jobs and no jobs. There has been uncertainty of life and life. There has been good health and bad health. There has been the birth of two kids in two years then a third unexpected one eight years later. There has been good decisions and bad decisions. There has been easy days and not so easy days. Through it all though they have made it and survived. I write all this in present tense because the marriage is still going.

Is it perfect? No. Never has been that is what makes it real.

Do they fight? Oh yeah but as years progress it is less about the marriage things and more about stupid politics. I tell her not to respond to his politic questions but she always does which leads to a fight about politics. They are both republicans though, he is just 1000% Republican and she is 95%.

Do they love each other? They must because it has been 50 years.

Does she run around? Well yeah my mom runs all over town doing something... working, shopping, movies, theme parks, etc. He does not care just as long as he knows her approximate vicinity. If we or she has not checked in by a certain time, you can guarantee the cell phone is going to ring with him saying this exact phrase, "Where the heck are you?" See he doesn't alwasy say I love you but he shows it in other ways.

Does he run around? Heck, no. You know you will always find him in his recliner in his den in front of the television. That is his comfort zone. Nothing ever changes. They found a groove that works for them and has survived for 50 years. Yep, wow 50 years.

What has amazed me lately? Their determination to pull together as a team to take care of my grandparents in the end. After all there is another sibling and my Dad is just the son-in-law and not the favored son-in-law through the years either. They have pulled together and were really there for my grandmother. He stayed every night at their house to take care of her at night for six months. He goes up some mornings to help my grandfather get up and get going for the day then he brings my grandfather in to our store for the day so he is taken care of yet my mom can work too. Then my mom does this on the other mornings and takes him home at night. It has been amazing to watch them work together for this.

This evening it dawned on me how fast 37 years of their marriage have gone by since I have been born . So they are now closer to tying my grandparents with only 22 years to go. I know my grandparents were married 72 years but that seemed ok because after all they were my grandparents. I am still having problems with the reality that my parents are old enough to be celebrating 50 years. That just seems like such a big number for my parents.

As for our plans. Our original plans were for a cruise with just them and us kids. Thanks to the economy that is not happening this year, maybe next year. So off to plan B. We are going to have a pasta dinner at our church for church friends, old friends and family next month. My sister and I get along mostly with ideas but this time we have two different ideas. She wants serious traditional. I want fun festive fiftie's retro style. We shall see who wins or if it ends in compromise.

Sorry this post was all over the place but I told you 50 years has baffled me.

1 comment:

That corgi :) said...

I think it is neat Becky that they have been married for 50 years! that is an accomplishment in these days. What a lovely tribute to them too in what you wrote. I hope they have a chance to read it. I think they compliment each other.

I think in this day and age, something festive to celebrate the years would be well received by all, but in the end it is what would they like to have done?

my inlaws celebrated their 50th back in 1997 and they decided to put on a buffet dinner for their friends (although they said the kids put the dinner on, but they did all the work and paid for it, they are like that, LOL).

Looking forward to hearing how it does get celebrated