Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Kids...You have to love them

Sunday School on Mother's Day we were discussing honoring your Mother even when she makes mistakes and forgiving them . I asked one of my first grade boys if his Mom ever makes mistakes. He responded..... Oh man, she makes a lot of them. I could only laugh.

Today my nephew received his work envelope for the week with all his grades for last week in it. He was stressed that he earned an F on his last vocabulary test. He does not make F's. He is an honor roll student and his parents are hard on him about staying on the honor roll. He showed it to me and asked if I would trash it before his Mommy saw it. I told him I couldn't. He gave me the goo-goo eyes. He asked if I could hide it in my garage. I don't know why the garage was so important because his Mom rarely comes over here. I told him I could not do that. He got quiet for awhile. I then looked at him messing with the envelope then erasing something and doing it again. My almost eight year old nephew was trying to forge their initials on the envelope they must sign each week. I never thought of such a thing until high school. That is how scared he was. The F paper was accidentally left here. It is not my fault that he packed all the papers up to take home while I was still looking at his mistakes. Then we ran out the door to go to baseball practice.

What would you do? I know what I should do but I also know how hard they are on him about his grades. It is crazy. Don't judge me until you are at his house during homework time. Dad sits there with an eraser to erase his mistakes before he even has a chance to see what he did wrong then gets yelled at for not doing it right.

Let me tell you about his last F paper from months ago. He was upset about it also. He was looking at it and was stressed about it. He packed his stuff up in the envelope and put it away. I was wondering why his Mom never seemed to fuss at him over that grade. Well a few weeks later my Mom found his F paper hidden under a bunch of papers on her desk. That devil.

It is sad though thought that at 7 years old this stresses him out and forces him to hide and think of ways to not let them see the grade.

We were not raised this way. If we made the honor roll, great. If we didn't she was still proud that we did our best. I remember waiting until leaving for the bus stop to show her a D that needed to be signed. She just asked... Did you try? I said yes and it was over. I didn't make many D's or F's though. I did fail 8th grade world literature. She was concerned but not stressed because it was all about mythology and I did not believe or understand it. It was against all Christianity that I had been taught. She asked if I had tried and even tried to do it with me. It wasn't happening. She knows I tried. No punishment, no fussing. It was over. I wish my sister would remember her upbringing. We turned out ok.


That corgi :) said...

that's why I hate grades on papers especially at young ages like your nephew. I know there has to be some indication of their work and if they are "getting it" or not, but it does cause undue stress when they have a rough week or have trouble getting a concept and I think it also causes low self esteem if a struggling student gets lots of low grades. But the alternative, I don't know, but I think there should be something especially for those early grades.

What would I do? You did not help with the coverup. When nephew asked you to, you said "no" repeatedly. So the ball so to speak is in your nephew's court. He knew the paper was there, he knew it didn't make it make into the folder. I would put the paper some place where you can access it and give it to him if he asks for it.

Sadly, the way grades are being emphasized to him and the stress it is causing him is going to be a problem now and later in his schooling, either causing him tooo much stress or him going the other way and rebeling against working to do his best.

I would make sure if he is struggling in a subject though that he is getting extra help if he needs it or if this was just a "fluke" with the low grade this week


The Brown Recluse said...

The poor baby. If one of my angels asked me to hide a paper, I probably would have. lol